Sunday, July 1, 2012
I woke up tearing on my cheeks today. It has been so long since i try to catch myself back to clearly think. Thinking everything is alright things gonna get better doesnt work in the end. Truth is truth. The dead cannot be brought back to life anymore. So did my love for you.
I have already feel the difference. I could already tell. I didnt show, that doesnt mean i dont care. I am not strong, but i will hide it. But how long can i dodge this feeling. Not sms-ing me before sleep, relationship status, surprising me in school, making things for me in every monthsary. Different. I could tell the difference. But i dont show. Loving someone is not hard, but it isnt easy as well. You may love someone whole heartedly and truthfully but they may not feel the same way back. I realise that im a very selfish person, holding something that has already changed and living in my pretense all these while. So what if it last for, 1 year? 3 years? Another 5 maybe? But i cant change the fact that it has already happened. Today will not be the day i hurt the most. Because it already did happened before. I could just pretend and dodge and hide away all these myself until one day when it all burst out.
You dont need to feel unfair. Because the world is already unfair. Some people was born rich while others, poor. Is a matter of how hard you fight and change your destiny. For me, i have fight hard for you as i know. So its okay to be unfair. In the end of the day. The one that you love most isnt me.
Fact is a fact. The one typing down here may the one that loves you the most. And it couldnt be changed.
(7:16:00 PM)