Thursday, July 12, 2012
Im so tired...everything i do is always wrong. Why???
Told you there isnt need to be stress, you still can do it, becomes my fault..If i dont say anything, also my fault because i dont care...
What is, who is, how is the boyi you want? Or you already dont want at all...Im really very very restless. Im very stressed.
(6:30:00 PM)
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
I didnt show it, doesnt mean i dont know. I knew it. But..
I still submit all myself to you. I dont know why, maybe i should find the reason myself. After all, will you ?
Those passionate words
that whispered 'I love you'
turn cold like an ice,
step on my everything more cruelly than strangers,
and leave me.
Since you gave me love,
is it right for me to be in pain
when you give me the good bye as well?
Look back at me at at then,
Look at those black flowers
that bloomed from your cruelty,
away from your cold glare hidden inside a mask
in this twisted world.
Look at your deceived love that only looked white.
You say you love me like crazy
and then you say you hate me like crazy,
Did your burning love
become a reason to hate over night?
Since you gave me love,
is it right for me to be in pain
when you give me the good bye as well?
Look back at me at at that time,
Look at those black flowers
that sprouted from your cruelty,
away from your cold glare hidden inside a mask
in this twisted world.
Look at your deceitful love that only looked white.
Go Go Don't look back
Go Go I no longer
want you. How you end this,
you saying sorry because you weren't good to me,
your temperamental heart,
your unpredictable love,
I'm sick of it all.
Try crying sometimes then,
open up my bursting heart
towards your sad face, your smile,
and erase the black flowers that bloomed in your pretense.
Your deceitful love that seemed to last forever.
Look back at me at at that time,
Look at those black flowers
that sprouted from your cruelty,
away from your cold glare hidden inside a mask
in this twisted world.
Look at your deceitful love that only looked white.
(12:57:00 AM)
Sunday, July 1, 2012
I woke up tearing on my cheeks today. It has been so long since i try to catch myself back to clearly think. Thinking everything is alright things gonna get better doesnt work in the end. Truth is truth. The dead cannot be brought back to life anymore. So did my love for you.
I have already feel the difference. I could already tell. I didnt show, that doesnt mean i dont care. I am not strong, but i will hide it. But how long can i dodge this feeling. Not sms-ing me before sleep, relationship status, surprising me in school, making things for me in every monthsary. Different. I could tell the difference. But i dont show. Loving someone is not hard, but it isnt easy as well. You may love someone whole heartedly and truthfully but they may not feel the same way back. I realise that im a very selfish person, holding something that has already changed and living in my pretense all these while. So what if it last for, 1 year? 3 years? Another 5 maybe? But i cant change the fact that it has already happened. Today will not be the day i hurt the most. Because it already did happened before. I could just pretend and dodge and hide away all these myself until one day when it all burst out.
You dont need to feel unfair. Because the world is already unfair. Some people was born rich while others, poor. Is a matter of how hard you fight and change your destiny. For me, i have fight hard for you as i know. So its okay to be unfair. In the end of the day. The one that you love most isnt me.
Fact is a fact. The one typing down here may the one that loves you the most. And it couldnt be changed.
(7:16:00 PM)